You can do this…you’ve done this jump so many times already.… I mutter to myself, shaking the chills off of my body. With that motivational note in my mind and my butt pads to save me, what could possibly go wrong? 

Next thing I know, I’m sprawled on the ice and shaken from the impact of my fall. I had attempted another double flip and dropped the landing.  It’s no big deal; I fall plenty of times. Huffing, I dug my left toe into the ice, frustrated with my unsuccessful attempt, and slowly rose back up. But the second I step down on my right foot, an agonizing pain shoots up from my toes to my ankle. Instantly regretting the decision to bear weight on my right foot, I plopped right back on the ice and crawled toward the wall. What the heck…. The pain continued to aggravate a single spot on my ankle, making it difficult to even skate to the boards. 

Clinging to the hockey box, I gracelessly stumbled over to the bench and slumped down in the seat. Cursing under my breath, I briskly unlaced my skates and pulled my foot out. Biting my lip, I pulled off my sock to reveal my bare foot. There aren’t any signs of swelling. Maybe I just rolled my ankle.  Maybe I just need a day. Maybe it won’t hurt tomorrow.

But tomorrow turned into a week and then another. Two weeks becomes four weeks. By the end of the fourth week, I found myself in a waiting room for an MRI scan. Chills ran down my spine and my fingers fidgeted restlessly in my lap. The hands of the clock seemed to slow to a moderate tempo, each tick ringing in my ear. Whatever happened last year surely won’t happen this time.

A week later, the results are in. “Carys,” my dad says from the driver’s seat of the car. “We have to take this season off.” 

My heart drops. With tears burning the edges of my eyes, I slump farther down into my seat and peer at my twin sister, with blurry eyes, who is in the backseat from the rearview mirror. Frustration and sadness start to swirl inside me. There is absolutely no way I could let this happen. I didn’t want all my hard work from the off season to go to waste…

While I began to feel hopeless, I also began to wonder: how can I not fall behind? There must be a solution as to how I can maintain my training. Surely, not everything can’t go down the drain. Maybe, I can switch my lessons on ice to off ice conditioning sessions! 

“Hey,” I turn to look at my dad, the wheels churning in my head as I think this through. “Maybe I can work with my coach in the morning off the ice instead of having on ice lessons.” Just the thought of going to the rink every morning and continuing on with my lessons swallows the sadness within me. A smile blooms on my face as I wipe the dried up tears on my face. 

He reaches over to my head and gives it an affectionate pat. “We can ask Coach Marina if she can still work with you tomorrow morning.” 

The next morning, I am up at 6 AM wide awake and pumped for an off-ice workout session with my coach. The previous evening, both my parents and I had communicated with my coaches to continue with my lessons and exchange the on-ice practices to off-ice training. During these sessions, Marina puts me through a grueling conditioning workout for my abs and back. Every set of 25 sit ups is followed by an extra 25 glute bridges. By the end of the session, my jacket is usually tossed aside, and my body is feeling fatigued, just like how it would be after running a program on ice. I love the sensation of moving my body again. 

Two time world champion Tara Lipinski said, “You have to train your mind just as much as you train your body.” Having the ability to move my body again reminds me that not only does my physical self matter, but so does my mental self. Just as whenever I’m tempted to be disappointed about my injury, I remind myself that I am still working toward my goals. The morning workouts help me stay disciplined and focused on my goal. A minor setback like this doesn’t mean my entire career is over. It means that I am capable of persevering.