Top 10 Suggestions for Feeling Less Single On Valentine’s Day
- Take a plastic dummy for a drive in the carpool lane - Third-wheel on your friends’ romantic date - Splurge on new $50 water bottle (hey, it's cheaper than a nice bouquet of roses for the partner you don't have) - Rent a local aspiring actor to pose as your spouse - Bring a puppy/baby/small harmless rodent to a public park and solicit compliments from strangers - Take up a fun new ...
Let the AI Machine Quiz Gadget Calculate How Single You Are
How single are you? This AI Machine Quiz Gadget ©—awarded the “Eerily Accurate” award by Forbes in 2013—will tell you Enter all calculated amounts in the white boxes 1. How many cats and sweaters do you own? Multiply them together. ⬜ 2. Have you named your succulent/car/another favorite inanimate object?? Enter the total letters in his—ahem, its—name. ⬜ 3. ...
Valentine’s Day Rabbit Holes
Valentine’s Day can be overwhelming! It’s easy to fall down a rabbit hole when you’re shopping for gifts—but that can look very different for people in and out of relationships. ...
How To Forget Valentine’s Day Exists
1. The night before, go to sleep very late so that you won’t wake up till noon 2. To avoid social media, throw your phone at a wall 3. Close all the windows in your house to avoid seeing all the happy people in the outside world 4. Play some heavy rock music 5. Watch a scary movie (This guide is also applicable for remembering Halloween exists) ...
A Love Letter to Starbucks
Dear Starbucks, Billion-dollar corporate chain, my absolute life and livelihood, I miss you with the intensity of a barista on her third shot of morning espresso. I love your $5 coffees and your $6 roasted tomato and mozzarella paninis, at which I shamelessly throw all my money as if you were a fountain at an amusement park. But, alas, love has no price! I love your $5 matcha lattes,...
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