Imagined Conversations With Weird Neighbors While Trick-Or-Treating
The Neighborhood Dentists
You: Trick or treat!
Dentists: Here’s a toothbrush. Make sure to brush your teeth for at least 2 minutes tonight!
You: Ok. Do you have any candy?
Dentists: Ha! Toothpaste IS the dentist industry’s candy.
The Raisin Givers
You: Trick or Treat!
Raisin Giver: Happy Halloween! Which type of raisins do you want? We’ve got both green and purple grapes.
You: I’m okay, thanks.
Raisin Givers: We’ve got prunes inside as well.
The Ones Who Pretends Not to be Home
You: *ring doorbell*
Ones Who Pretend Not to Be Home: *runs quickly to turn off all the lights*
“GET OFF MY LAWN”ers
You: *walks up to house*
Get-off-my-lawn-ers: “GET OFF MY LAWN”
*Sprinklers go off. You, a now damp ghost, wander back to the street, cold, shivering, leaving behind a trail of water droplets.*
The Rich Dads who give out King Size Candy Bars
You: *walks up to extravagant mansion*
Rich Dad: *opens the door and holds out a big bucket of kings sized candy bars*
Rich Dad: Door slams
You: *With a sigh of defiant protest, you chuck the candy bar into the bushes. Realize later it wasn’t worth it.*
The Actually Scary House
You: *debating if you should go up to the house*
*the front door opens by itself and a gust of wind blows in your face*
The Lonely Cat Lady
You: Trick or Treat
Cat Lady: *opens door and a bunch of cats are seen all around her*
You: Would you like some mints dear?
*sees 10 cats staring into your soul*
“Um- I think I’m good!”
*runs away before cats can find your social security number, Instagram, and where you live*
The Highschool Party Animals
*loud music blasting*